Tuesday, November 02, 2010

Game Film Week 12


Game Film Week 12

So, one of the points I want to make is that because so much of what we read begins life as a press release, journalists are daily confronted with what sometimes borders on near illiteracy. So, to sum up, here are some of the issues that you need to deal with (and if you can think of any more, please contribute.):
  1. Editors and reporters have to figure out if what is contained in the release is news – or should the source be sent off to buy an ad. Sometimes this is not so clear and different publications have different policies. Here, this requires you to think critically about what is news.
  2. Sometimes a release has so many holes – like some of the W’s left out – that a reporter needs to make some calls. Here, you need to figure out whether the news is worth all that effort.
  3. Sometimes a release can be the source of story ideas. Possibly, you might feel the info is worth more than a brief. Then editor and reporter sit down to figure out how to report the story.
  4. So often, the news – and especially the lead – is hidden in a morass of froth and back-grounding.  You have to take your intellectual scalpel and carve away whatever is not the news.
  5. Too many PR practitioners like to use “we” and “our” and “us” and “you” and sometimes I.
  6. Too many PR practitioners have no idea what AP style is – and yet they want to see their work appear in publications that use that style.
  7. Too many PR practitioners love adjectives and hyperbole sans evidence to support hyperbolic assertions.
  8. Too many PR practitioners love dead constructions rather than active verbs.
 Check out some rewrites from lab this week I found particularly noteworthy.

original press releases  

rewrites  
As part of Microsoft Corp.’s continued efforts to promote computer literacy among U.S. Hispanics and in light of the upcoming holiday season, Microsoft has joined the Los Angeles-based Boyle Heights Technology Youth Center (BHTYC), whose mission is devoted to enhancing opportunities for future Latino leaders and encouraging parental involvement, to host a special holiday workshop for the Hispanic community. The workshop will teach parents and children how to save money and prepare for the holidays using Microsoft Office Home and Student 2007 and the Microsoft Office 2007 Language Pack — Spanish.
(Free-Press-Release.com) October 29, 2010 -- If you're thinking about joining GDI, you're making a smart choice. Global Domains International is a rock solid company that has been going strong since 1999. In this 'here today, gone tomorrow' industry of MLM, affilite and network marketing programs, the kind of stability GDI offers is very rare.

The fact that people are hesitant when it comes to looking at a home business opportunity is understandable.
After all, the vast majority of people who have tried to start a home business in the past have failed.
The failure rate is actually pretty high but here is the funny thing.
This industry has created more wealth for the average person without any prior education or experience than any thing else out there.
That means, it does not matter how educated you are.
It does not matter what your skill sets are.
Anyone can succeed and make their financial dreams their life - INCLUDING YOU!

GAINESVILLE, Fla. - The City of Gainesville Department of Parks, Recreation and Cultural Affairs is hosting the 2nd Annual Beaux-Arts Ball at the Thomas Center on Saturday, Feb. 13, 2010 from 8 to 11 p.m. The Beaux-Arts Ball is a costume gala that, in keeping with the Center’s 1920s history, is themed “The Roaring Twenties.” Live 1920s era jazz music by the six-piece band 23 Skiddoo has been put together by popular area musician Bill Hutchinson just for the occasion. There will be costumed professional dancers from Mostly Swing Gainesville demonstrating and teaching the popular dances of the times such as the Black Bottom, Lindy Hop and Charleston, along with an assortment of flappers and gangsters. There will be heavy hors d’oeuvres and BYOB (or flask!) set-ups. (Let’s hope the Untouchables don’t raid us due to prohibition!) General admission tickets are $85. Tickets reserved before February 5 are discounted to $75. Space is limited, so advance reservations are recommended. The Beaux-Arts Ball is part of the Valentine’s Day’s weekend and will offer couples a perfect romantic evening of dancing and dining in the beautiful Thomas Center Spanish Court. All proceeds from the Beaux-Arts Ball will benefit the new Thomas Center Theatre for Young Audiences programming.
TORONTO, CANADA, November 02, 2010 /24-7PressRelease/ -- The goal of the Brazilian Butt Lift is to create a perkier, more youthful, and sensual backside. It requires taking fat from one area of the body, such as flanks, hips, or tummy, and strategically transferring this fat to reshape the buttocks. The reshaping can provide lift and/or a more voluptuous shape and sensuous body profile. The results can be customized to the individual and cultural desires of each woman. "Meticulous attention to minute detail is crucial to achieve beautiful outcomes in body contouring surgery", Dr. Jugenburg says,

GAINESVILLE, Fla. - Gainesville will transform into a masterful blend of art, music and entertainment during the 29th Annual Downtown Festival & Art Show, one of the nation’s premier outdoor fine arts festivals. Presented by the City of Gainesville Department of Parks, Recreation and Cultural Affairs, the festival draws a crowd of more than 100,000 each year. On Saturday, Nov. 6, and Sunday, Nov. 7, from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., visitors can meet the exhibiting artists, enjoy live music and dancing and sample international cuisine.

GAINESVILLE, Fla.  - The City of Gainesville Department of Parks, Recreation and Cultural Affairs is proud to announce the reopening of Ironwood Golf Course to the public on Monday, Nov. 1. The seven month renovation project was very successful and has improved the entire course. Golf course architect, Mike Beebe, and MacCurrach Golf Construction, Inc. took what was already considered one of the best layouts in north central Florida to a level that will put Ironwood on par with the best golf courses in the area.

GAINESVILLE, Fla.  - Only one rock concert made such a huge and lasting impression that an entire generation was named for it. Forty-one years ago, more than 400,000 members of the Woodstock generation gathered in upstate New York to celebrate “three days of peace and music.” One year ago, 3,000 area residents flocked to the Bo Diddley Community Plaza for the largest “Free Fridays” concert of all time, a tribute to Woodstock on its fortieth birthday, presented by a group of local musicians that dubbed themselves the Relics especially for the tribute concert.


GAINESVILLE, Fla. - The City of Gainesville Department of Parks, Recreation and Cultural Affairs invites the public to join us for our annual series of family friendly free concerts in the Bo Diddley Community Plaza. Featuring some of the best local and regional musicians, this series runs for nearly six months out of the year and is highly anticipated by its many fans. For well over a decade, all ages have brought their blankets and lawn chairs into our beautiful downtown amphitheatre and joined in the fun under the stars.





Jacksonville, Fla. – Over one hundred senior citizens gathered on October 1 to celebrate their completion of the Schell-Sweet/EWC Senior Wellness Obesity Program at City Kidz Ice Cream CafĂ©.
The event lasted from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., allotting time for an awards ceremony, lunch, and dancing. The seniors had the opportunity to speak about personal triumphs and testimonies with friends and supporters of the program, some sharing they lost upwards of 40 pounds.
It was truly an amazing sight as the entire group stood up from their seats, some in their 80s and 90s, and spoke of how the program has allowed them to feel better than ever. One gentleman stated that by the program teaching healthy eating and exercising practices, he has gained a newness he lacked for many years.

TALLAHASSEE, Fla. – Traffic crashes are the #1 killer of teens in Florida and in the United States. To keep more teens safe in the driver and passenger seat, the Department of Highway Safety and Motor Vehicles encourages all Floridians to participate in a statewide White Out next week. The Department asks Floridians to show support by wearing a white shirt on Oct. 19, 2010, to help white out teen crashes. The Department will observe National Teen Driver Safety Week on Oct. 17 – 23, and use the opportunity to educate teens and their parents about staying safe behind the wheel.




 “Another day, another food recall,” may sound like an exaggeration, but we checked the data and discovered that in the last five years there have been 2,549 food recalls by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) and United States Department of Agriculture (USDA).That amounts to more than one recall per day! Additionally, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that every year in the United States there are 76 million cases of food borne illnesses, 325,000 hospitalizations, and 5,000 deaths. These statistics make you wonder if the food in your fridge is safe to eat.


GAINESVILLE, Fla. - The Leadon Family Band consists of Mark Leadon and younger sister Monica Leadon Cooper, along with a stellar group of some of Gainesville’s finest musicians. Mark and Monica are members of the long-time Gainesville musical family, the Leadons. Two of their older brothers have had noted and successful careers in music, which included playing in bands in Gainesville during their younger years.







PHOENIX, AZ, October 27, 2010 /24-7PressRelease/ -- Plastic surgery patients looking to sculpt their abdominal region often ask about liposuction or abdominoplasty (tummy tuck). However, even these procedures, which are very effective, may not be right for everyone. However, all is not lost. A Brazilian plastic surgeon named Dr. Saldanha introduced a new technique that combined liposuction and the tummy tuck. Called lipoabdominoplasty, this procedure may be ideal for those looking to sculpt their midsection and tighten their abdominal muscles.








Microsoft has joined the Los Angeles-based Boyle Heights Technology Youth Center (BHTYC) this holiday season to promote computer literacy among U.S. Hispanics.

The workshop will teach parents and children how to save money using Microsoft Office Home and Student 2007 and the Microsoft Office 2007 Language Pack — Spanish.
The event, which is slated for Saturday Dec. 6, is free and open to the public.



Global Domains International, an Internet marketing program, is looking for new members.
  The program, created in 1999 and headed by Tim Sebert, teaches members how to build their own GDI team instantly and virally.



Health and wellness company GBG is offering reliable workers a way to build a profitable business with its new 10 in One Liquid Vitamin and Mineral Super Formula.  GBG’s 10 in One is a vitamin and mineral supplement that is made up of fruits and a vitamin-like substance called CoQ10.    

 It is the most complete, easy to assimilate liquid vitamin and mineral supplement and it is priced at $39.97.







 
Dress up in 1920s costume and join the Gainesville Department of Parks, Recreation and Cultural Affairs  for a nostalgic trip to the era of jazz, gangsters, flappers, swing dance and speakeasies
    The second annual Beaux-Arts Ball at the Thomas Center for the Arts will be held Feb. 13, 2010, from 8 p.m. to 11 p.m.
    This year’s ball is being presented as a part of the Thomas Center’s 100th anniversary celebration.
   The costume gala is themed “The Roaring Twenties” and will feature the six-piece jazz band 23 Skidoo and costumed professional dancers teaching dances such as the Lindy Hop and the Charleston.















     
       A local doctor is putting a new spin on plastic surgery.  Dr. Martin Jugenburg is performing a new type of body contouring plastic surgery; the Brazilian Butt Lift. 
            The goal of the procedure is to create a perkier, more youthful, and sensual backside. During the surgery, Jugenburg takes fat from one area of the body, such as flanks, hips, or tummy, and strategically transfers this fat to the buttocks.
            The reshaping procedure can provide lift or a more voluptuous shape. The results can be customized to the individual and cultural desires of each woman.

The City cityof Gainesville will be hosting the 29th annual Downtown Festival & Art Show Nov. 6 and 7.

The two-day festival will feature artistic showcases with from more than 250 of the nation’s artists and an artisans’ competition awarding more than $18,000 in prizes.





The Department of Parks, Recreation and Cultural Affairs has announced the reopening of Ironwood Golf Course.

The golf course has completed a seven-month renovation project and will reopen on Monday, Nov. 1.

The renovations were designed by architect Mike Beebe and MacCurrach Golf Construction, Inc., a private construction firm.


The Relics, a group of local musicians that celebrate the music of Woodstock will be performing on Oct. 8 in the Bo Diddley Community Plaza as part of Gainesville’s “Free Fridays” series.

The performance is a follow-up to a performance last year that had over 3,000 area residents in attendance and was the largest concert in “Free Fridays” history.

Bob McPeek, a local musician, proposed the idea for The Relics last year to city event coordinator David Ballard.


“Hogtown Music Heroes,” a tribute concert for Gainesville musicians, will be held May 7 at the Bo Diddley Community Plaza downtown.

Musicians including Bo Diddley, Tom Petty, Stephen Stills and the Eagles’ Bernie Leadon and Don Felder will perform.

The concert will kick off the annual “Let’s Go Downtown Free Fridays Concert Series” hosted by the City of Gainesville Department of Parks, Recreation and Cultural Affairs. This year, concerts will be held every Friday from May 7 through Oct. 15 from 8 p.m. to 10 p.m.

More than 100 seniors celebrated completing an anti-obesity wellness program on Oct. 1 at a downtown Jacksonville ice cream shop.
The Schell-Sweet/Edward Waters College Senior Wellness Program graduates, some in their 80s and 90s, gathered at City Kidz Ice Cream Cafe from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. to share their personal triumphs. Some said they had lost more than 40 pounds.
The event featured an awards ceremony, lunch with a specially provided salad bar and dancing, including The Twist.
"It was tremendously inspirational to see how the program transformed their lives," Blake Hacht, a spokesman for Edward Waters College, said in a news release.




To raise awareness of teen traffic crashes, Florida’s highway safety department is encouraging Floridians to wear white next week.
The Florida Department of Highway Safety and Motor Vehicles “White Out” event takes place Oct. 19. The event coincides with National Teen Driver Safety Week, which happens between Oct. 17 and Oct. 23.
According to the department’s 2009 Florida Traffic Crash Statistics Report, 29,485 crashes involved teenagers last year. In those crashes, 153 teens died and 19,292 were injured.
With 772,910 teenagers between 15 and 19 licensed to drive in Florida, about one in 25 will be in a wreck.

Florida State College at Jacksonville has announced a new biotechnology track focused on food safety, specializing in seafood.
FSCJ is partnering with Eurofins, an international food testing company, to provide students with training in a professional and teaching lab at the Downtown campus.
“There is an absolute shortage of food safety professionals,” said Patricia Wester, director of food safety systems for Eurofins US. “The industry, retailers and commercial lab entities, such as Eurofins, are all desperately in need of trained, qualified quality assurance

The Leadon Family Band, headlined by Mark Leadon and younger sister Monica Leadon-Cooper, will perform Oct. 1 as part of Gainesville’s Free Fridays Concert Series.
The series is a Gainesville initiative bringing musicians to the Bo Diddley Community Plaza Friday nights through Oct. 15.
The Leadon Family Band concerts consist of mostly original songs written by Mark and Monica Leadon. Their songs are expressive of themes and musical sounds found in folk, country-rock and rock and roll songs. They are also inspired by the sounds of their two older brothers, Bernie and Tom Leadon.
For those looking for sleeker, toned midsections without the hassle of exercising or dieting, a new procedure combining liposuction and tummy tuck procedures already done throughout the U.S has been introduced to the market.

Brazilian plastic surgeon Dr. NAME Saldanha combines the two procedures in a process called lipoabdominoplasty. This uses the same principles as traditional liposuction (sucking out the fat) and traditional abdominoplasty (removing excess skin).







[1] I can’t tell from the press release what GBG stands for, but I would figure it out so that I could spell out the name on first reference.